he referred to my room as the tit cave...
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
