ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
handjob tips. give me some.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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