Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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