According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
