she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
