just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize
