Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Randomize
