I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Randomize
