Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
