Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
My vagina is officially offended.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him