This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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