I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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