Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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