I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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