No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I still have a little drunk in my system
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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