Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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