yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I am one with the molecules
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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