My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
