I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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