I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
