do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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