Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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