We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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