she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize