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Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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