I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!