The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
