I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
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