Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
