oh god the rape fog is back!
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
