I wish I only lived at night.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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