i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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