u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
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