Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
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