And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
