an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
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him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
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I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
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