She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize