I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
