I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Randomize
