if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
