She said her name was "party"
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
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I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
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