dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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