Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
