brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
