idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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