After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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