it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
