Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tied me up with her honor cords...
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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