:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
im holly from the hills drunk
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
