And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I need moral support for this bender
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
