If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even